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Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category

The Snack Battle

Admin:

#TBT.. A glimpse back to Halloween of 2009. Too bad nothing has changed and I’m still wondering where all the Kit Kats went from the bag of Halloween candy I bought 2 weeks ago (and it’s only October 16th!)

Originally posted on The Hubby Diaries:

Today is Halloween.  For normal people, Halloween is a time to celebrate the Fall season with tricks & treats and ghosts and goblins.

For me however, it’s a day to test my ingenuity.

 

Let me explain.

 

Hubby has a sweet tooth.  He has a weakness for certain candies & cookies.  Anytime I bring something into the house that I know he likes, I have to either:

  • Stash some away for me or….
  • Buy multiple boxes to ensure that I get a taste. 

I’m the kind of person that could make a box of cookies last weeks.  I may eat 2 today, then none for 3 days, then maybe 2 more, then none for a week.  The problem with this method of consumption is that by day number 5, when I go to the cabinet I cannot find the package of cookies…. because, while I’ve been savoring this snacking…

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Today, hubby and I celebrate our 11th wedding anniversary.  It’s certainly been a crazy ride.  I started this blog 3 days before our anniversary in 2009. (So, this is also my 5 year Blogiversary!)  I guess maybe,  it’s not a normal person who decides that an appropriate anniversary “gift” to their husband is a blog (open to the entire internet world) that shares all the things that are irritating, annoying, frustratingdang keyboard… I mean ENDEARING about living with him.

 

But, nobody ever said I was normal.   (Even my grandma - who is probably dancing somewhere in a far away place celebrating my anniversary – thought I was a little bit “not normal”)

 

So here we are 11 years into our marriage.  12+ years into our relationship.  And 5 years into a blog that many naysayers insisted would destroy the underlying fabric of our lives together.  To them, I say a big FAT phooey.

 

The only things that could destroy our marriage are crumbssoda cans, a distinct inability to clean properly and a lack of awareness of the laundry room.  And, thanks to this blog, rather than let these petty annoyances destroy our marriage I just share the stories with all of you and all of a sudden I feel better!  The blog is like therapy for me.  It lets me tell you all how insane our lives can be.  It lets you laugh along with us.  It lets you feel better about your marriage because you can either identify with us – OR – because you realize your spouse is awesome by comparison and you’re incredibly lucky to not be stuck eating flat cheese, worrying about which bowl to use for the ice cream, or having absurd conversations about pizza toppings with mine!

 

Like many marriages, ours works despite our differences.  Despite petty crap and despite the steam that can come out of my ears as I walk past a pile of hubby’s “stuff”, that’s been sitting in the family room for weeks, for like the bazillionth time.  Yes, those days are the days when I realize that I love him.  It make take me a while to get there – but eventually I do – and I realize that there’s nobody else’s underwear I want to step over. Nobody else’s toothpaste I want to wipe up.  And, nobody else’s quirks I want to write about.

 

Those are the days I realize what a great guy I have.  One who’s a great dad and truly a great partner.  Even if he just happens to annoy the ever-living-crap out of me sometimes.

 

There are many things that make each of us who we are.  These things could be described as; personality traits, idiosyncrasies, quirks.   For some, the words could be; weird, strange, eccentric, unique.    Regardless of the actual vocabulary you use to describe someone, think about this:  If every single one of us wasn’t just a little bit “weird”, in our own way, wouldn’t we all be exactly the same?  And isn’t some of that “uniqueness” exactly why you wound up with the person you are currently with?  So, every time your spouse reminds you of their uniqueness, it should also remind you of why you got together in first place.  And, on the days you want to kill each other… take a step back, think about the trait that’s bothering you and ask yourself……………. Is today the day I should I start a blog??

 

Happy Anniversary Hubby….. with many more to come!

choose again

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The Super Frosty Zone

Admin:

#TBT…. As always for throw back Thursday I share an older THD post. Since we’ve been a bit MIA lately (due to a vacation) I thought it was appropriate to share an old vacation story!

Originally posted on The Hubby Diaries:

So, I’m certain that most of you are aware that hubby is a little quirky.   It’s equally what makes me love him and roll my eyes at him at the very same time!

 

Sometimes the things that come out of his mouth are so comical that you sit there, anxiously awaiting his admission that he’s kidding.. but usually this never comes.   I mean honestly, who needs to eat their cheese flat or requires specific bowls for specific foods?  But, even after all these years, he continues to find new ways to surprise me with his oddities!

 

Another obviously nutty quirk weaseled it’s way to the surface while we were on vacation last week.

 

Let me set the scene for you.

 

We’re lounging in the sun by the pool at our resort.  We’re lathered with sunscreen.  We’re listening to the ocean and watching the boats go…

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HELP! I Can’t Find It!

Admin:

In honor of #TBT, I share an older post from THD history every Thursday. If you have a husband who can’t EVER find ANYTHING. this one’s for you!

Originally posted on The Hubby Diaries:

A typical conversation in my house (you can insert any item you’d like into this conversation)

 

Hubby:  “I looked everywhere, it’s gone”

Me: “You looked everywhere….. hmmm??”

Hubby: “Yes, I just spent the last 10 minutes looking for it, and it’s not there”

Me: “Did you look in the closet?”

Hubby: “Yep”

Me: “Did you look in the cubby in the garage?”

Hubby: “Yes, I even picked up the stuff and checked behind it”

Me: “Are you sure you really looked?”

Hubby: “Yes, it’s gone”

Me: “So, if I were to get up right now and look in the closet, it wouldn’t be there”

Hubby: “No way… “

Me: “So, if I did happen to find it, how much will you give me?”

Hubby: “I’m not giving you anything… it’s not there”

Me: “Ok, $5.00 if I find it”

 

I stop whatever I’m doing, walk upstairs…

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Men Are Like Toasters

Admin:

In honor of #TBT, I share an older post from THD history every Thursday. Hope you enjoy!!

Originally posted on The Hubby Diaries:

Last night hubby told me he was “multi-tasking”.  He was, and I quote…..”eating dinner & watching tv at the same time”.

 

We all know that women are far better at juggling many different tasks at once.  We’ll even at times, stop in the middle of one task, to quickly complete another as we’re walking by.

 

A very basic example…

 

If I’m brushing my teeth and notice that there’s a speck of something on the mirror, I’ll grab a towel and clean it off (all the while still brushing)

Hubby on the other hand (in this same scenario).. has actually PUT the speck of stuff on the mirror, while he was brushing his teeth.  But, “cleaning day” is Saturday so the speck will have to wait.

 

Men can really only focus on a singular task at hand.  And, even with their focus on one, and only

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Selective Vision

Admin:

In honor of #TBT, I share an older post from THD history every Thursday. I still often wonder why hubby can’t see anything right in front of him……………… as always, just as relevant today as it was 5 years ago! ENJOY!

Originally posted on The Hubby Diaries:

Hubby has, what I like to call, Selective Vision.

 

No.. there’s not anything wrong with his eyesight. As a matter of fact, it could be argued that he has a highly trained eye.  Highly trained to only see that which is important to him.

 

Honestly, I’ve never really understood Selective Vision.

 

As a woman, we take in everything around us. Perhaps this is an innate trait given to us to be able to “have eyes in the back of our heads” for when we have children.  Or…. perhaps, it’s a trait developed over the years, and fine tuned to be able to compensate for male Selective Vision.

Either way, I’m always shocked at how truly oblivious hubby is.  If it doesn’t pertain to his immediate task, or if it’s not relevant to any activity of interest to him.. he truly does not see it. 

Last year…

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There is no single more recurring topic in this blog than laundry.

 

Since they say a picture is worth 1000 words… so today, I’m providing you with 4000 words.   Or, a pictorial glimpse into “My Life Through Laundry”

 

To start, you will see a basket filled with hubby’s clean & folded laundry from almost 2 weeks ago.  Behind this basket of laundry is an un-packed suitcase from a trip we took this past weekend,  filled with – yep, you guessed it…. dirty laundry.  And, oh yeah, beside the clean basket of clothes…… well, don’t ya know it…. more dirty laundry.

laundry basket

 

This is a snapshot of our bed (yes, it’s un-made – Don’t judge me!)… but, more importantly, it’s a shot of hubby’s jammies from last night – aka laundry.

bed laundry

 

This is a quick glimpse of hubby’s dresser.  It looks just as it always does… with a pile of folded & clean laundry on top.  (Laundry winds up here because some days, I actually need the basket  – you know, the one holding the clean laundry –  to go and carry more dirty laundry to be washed in the basement.  When I need the basket, I place the clean laundry on top of the bed… and then, it gets mysteriously moved here – to the TOP of the dresser.

dresser laundry

 

This is a view into our bathroom…. Or perhaps more accurately, more dirty laundry.  This laundry usually consists of what hubby wore yesterday.  It’s ever-present.  Perhaps not for more than 1 day – and hubby would have you believe that this laundry is, in fact, a gift to me.  In-so-much-as, if he comes to bed after me, he takes his clothes off in the bathroom so he won’t disturb me (there he is – my genuinely loving guy… always looking out for me).  Until of course you realize that Every-Day there’s the previous day’s outfit on the floor of the bathroom (and quite possibly – assorted other bonus items – do I see more jammies??!!)

 

bathroom laundry

 

I will also have you know that I literally just snapped these shots… each picture is not from a different day.  They are all from TODAY.  From 10 minutes ago.  I can take the same pictures tomorrow and then again on Friday.  This is my life.    The life I have chosen.   And…. You all wonder why I blog so much about laundry??

 

Share your best laundry pic over on our facebook page:  http://facebook.com/thehubbydiaries

 

 

 

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