I’ll start today with a very basic question….
Let’s say, you’re hungry for a snack and you’d really like some cookies but, when you go into the kitchen there aren’t any cookies. All you can find are a box of crackers.
Do you eat the crackers or do you stay hungry? Well of course you eat the crackers, after all, you are hungry and that’s all there is… it’s kind of a no brainer.
Of course this post isn’t actually about eating, or filling your belly at all… because the cookies I’m referring to are actually a metaphor.
I’d like to say this metaphor is exclusive to male dating mentality, but I feel the need to be completely honest and tell you that I literally used these opening sentences to describe my own love life before I met hubby.
Please follow along:
I wasn’t a chronic dater, I would find someone decent and settle into a relationship. I can remember one long term relationship where friends asked me why I was with the guy, as they didn’t see me marrying him. Actually, they didn’t see anything special about him at all and, to be quite honest, I didn’t see a long term future for us either. So my response, was to share with them the wisdom of my cracker & cookie analogy.. which may sound harsh, but at the time, it was the honest truth.
I finished by saying to them…
“Well I don’t have any cookies right now so, I’m eating crackers!”
For the rest of my relationship with this poor guy, he became known as “The Cracker”. Of course, he had no idea (or at least I don’t think he did!) but if we were all going out it wasn’t uncommon for friends to ask “is the cracker coming?”
I guess I finally realized that a girl cannot live on Saltines alone so… the next obvious step for me was to start actively “searching for my cookie”
Lucky for me, Hubby To Be came into my life (the boyfriend version of a warm, just baked chocolate chip cookie…. YUM!) But I digress….
He arrived just in time to meet Grandma during her last days in the hospital. She was close to the end but still pretty feisty. She latched onto his hand (just as she’d done to me) and she said to me…. “this is a nice boy”. I think it was my Grandmas’ dying wish that Hubby To Be save me from myself and make sure that I didn’t live to be the lonely, cracker eating, woman she saw in front of her. I bet if Grandma had actually known my cracker story she would have said, never settle. Or perhaps she would have whipped me up a fresh batch of her own cookies.
Needless to say, I think there are too many people out there who are eating crackers and have somehow accepted this bland, flavorless, uninspired diet. But, they don’t recognize the value of searching for that perfect cookie.
Now, I’m sure a man who is a chronic dater would argue that his cupboard is filled not with crackers, but a wide variety of cookies.
- Oatmeal Raisin
- Soft Chewy Entenmann’s
- Pepperidge Farm Milanos
- Or maybe even that ever so elusive Mallomar
And, I know it’s been said that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. But I’d challenge each of these single men to tell me if the snacks they are eating right now, are the snacks they really wanted when they went into the kitchen or, just the item that happened to be easiest to grab off the shelf?
We all know, that men take the easiest route, so it’s likely they just grabbed whatever was in front of them. And, even as they eat through their variety pack of cookies, thinking they are completely happy, they will soon realize that what they’re really craving now, is a tall glass of milk.
And, it’s very likely they are too lazy to get up and get one.
So… what are you eating right now??