Stair Wars

I’ve written before about hubby’s selective vision and his inability to notice even the smallest of details.  And, just last week I mentioned that hubby has a unique ability to ignore even the largest of details (like say, a 5 foot tv box in the hallway….)

 

But there are a couple of scenarios that repeat themselves over and over at our house and I have to admit… I think I’ll be forever baffled by them.

 

Today I’d like to highlight 2 of these situations and I’ll simply ask you.  Who’s the crazy one here?

 

SCENARIO #1

 

On a regular basis I like to straighten up our house.. (I know, I’m freakin’ crazy like that!!)

 

One of my regular de-cluttering techniques is to make the rounds throughout the lower level of our house and grab everything that belongs on the upper level.  I then take these items and I place them on one of the stairs.  They then sit on the bottom stairs while they await their final journey to their proper place upstairs.  They are in plain sight and a constant, subtle (yet obvious) reminder for anyone heading upstairs to not head up with empty arms-a-swinging…. Or so I thought.

 

• You’d probably assume that the next time hubby goes upstairs he’ll grab a few things to bring them to the bedroom…. BUT…. you’d be wrong.
• You may therefore assume that the items on the stairs are too tiny to garner attention… BUT…. you’d be wrong.
• You may also think that the items are possibly so few that they are crammed into a corner of the stairs and are easily avoided when walking upstairs…. BUT…. you’d be wrong!

 

It actually requires skillful avoidance tactics and deliberate, nimble footwork to ascend the stairs without disturbing these items.  This apparently is a skill hubby has honed without even realizing it.  It’s simply amazing to me how many trips he can make upstairs without carrying or seemingly noticing, the pile of stuff taking up 90% of the first two steps!  It’s a miracle he hasn’t hurt himself trying to step OVER these items to go upstairs!

 

Just a quick sidebar:  In speaking with others, I’ve heard that this style of “cleaning” is not that uncommon.  Many other women have mentioned that they too, place items on the stairs to carry up at a later time.  The interesting commonality seems to be that almost all men seem to be oblivious to the concept of carrying said items upstairs.    What gives men???

 

SCENARIO #2

 

Our laundry room is in the basement.  The basement is also hubby’s man cave.  These 2 pieces of information are very relevant to this story.

 

It’s not all that uncommon for me to open the door to the basement and toss down items that need to go to the laundry room.  Now, just so you don’t think I’m stripping down naked in the kitchen and tossing down dirty clothes… I don’t toss down just anything.  I only toss down something that needs to be washed that isn’t going into our dirty laundry basket upstairs.  This would include things like kitchen or bathroom hand towels or maybe swimming pool towels.  These items wind up at the bottom of the stairs and they sit there until the next time one of us goes into the basement, when they get moved into the laundry room…… Or so I thought.

 

Since hubby’s man cave is the basement, he inevitably spends WAY more time down there than I do.  I really only go into the basement to do laundry.   So on any given week, hubby will have been in and out of the basement anywhere from 4-5 times more than me.  And, he must step over and maneuver his way around anything at the bottom of the stairs to get to his video games.  It’s simply mind boggling to me that he can literally step over these towels and never even think to pick them up.

 

So, one day I go down to the basement to ask hubby a quick question while he’s playing video games.  I get to the bottom of the stairs and lo and behold, what do I see – a pile of towels.  So I say to hubby “Hon, how hard was it to step OVER these towels to get to the couch” and what do you think his response is….. “Ummmm… What towels?”.  Aarrrrrggghhhhh.  So, ever-so-sweetly I respond,  “The towels that are sitting here, at the bottom of the stairs.  The ones that need to go to the laundry room. The ones that created an obstacle for you to get to the video games.” “Oh”  he says, “I didn’t see them”.  Annoyed at how oblivious he is, I turn around and walk upstairs.  Mind you… the towels are still sitting there.

 

Eventually hubby comes back up and we go about our evening.  A day or two later I head down to do laundry.   I’ll give you a moment to guess what I found……

 

Yep, you know it, those damn towels are still sitting at the bottom of the stairs.   This means that hubby stepped over them, not just on the way down but ALSO on the way back up, without ever giving one thought to picking them up and moving them.   Maybe just maybe, this has something to do with hubby not realizing that linens are indeed laundry (if you haven’t read that post you can find it here) Or maybe it’s a more basic and universal question:  Why is it that men, many of whom claim that they hate to dance, can swiftly dance their way around anything in the way on the stairs?

 

I’d venture a guess that 1 out of every 5 or so times, hubby will actually recognize that there are items that need attention.  And while I really do try to celebrate small successes, this one is just to small to warrant celebration!

 

Ladies…. please share how you’ve successfully “trained” the men in your life to pick up those items on the stairs??  Obviously I could use some suggestions!

 

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