In honor of the final shuttle launch today I wanted to reflect back on a post I wrote back in 2009 (wow, I’ve been blogging for a while!). This post was about my dear old Dad.. and his effortless execution of “Man Time”. If you didn’t read that post (or you’ve forgotten the story) you can read it HERE. I will say.. that I’m now 40 years old and my model space shuttle is still dusty, in the basement and probably sad today as it considers it’s 30 yr tenure, in it’s dented box and incomplete state, as we watch the farewell voyage.
So, did you ever wonder why a project that’s supposed to happen in 2 hours could actually take 2 weeks? Or why something that’s going to “happen next” seems to not happen until next month?
Or maybe you’ve wondered why, when a man says “I’ll do it later“, “later” actually means at some undetermined time in the future. Not necessarily after he’s done watching the movie, or playing the video game. Later could easily be some time next Thursday or maybe the week after next or quite possibly immediately after pigs fly (and by flying pigs I do not mean the next football game… at least this might have a definitive timeline).
This phenomenon is the result of Man Time. The problem is that, as women, we don’t have the proper conversion tool to take man time and translate it into real time.
So today, I’m going to try to provide you with a Man Time to Real Time Conversion Chart.
(This of course is just a few thoughts and I’m sure if I had “man free time” I could invest the next 3 weeks making notes… but alas, I’m not a man… and I have laundry to do…..)
Man Time impact on starting a task:
2 Hours = 2 Hours unless
There is good movie on……. (add 2 hours)
There is a football game……. (add 4 hours)… if beer is involved… (add 24 hours)
There is a pizza nearby……. (add 30 minutes)
Pizza is used as a reward……. (deduct 30 minutes)
There is a naked woman nearby…… (good luck getting him to do anything ever)
There is a naked woman used as reward…… (deduct 1 hour)
The task involves…
Any sort of cleaning…… (add 1-4 hours)
Any sort of electronics……. (deduct 30 minutes)
The electronics make noises…… (deduct 1 hour)
Anything he doesn’t like doing…… (add anywhere from 2 hours to 10 years depending on the activity)
As you can see, there is some rhyme or reason to the completion time-table. What I’m still struggling to figure out though, is the space shuttle time conversion. I’m just not exactly sure what makes “next weekend” equal 30 years…. unless this has something to do with some sort of actual space/time travel…… can anyone shed any light on that??!! Uhmmmmm Dad?!
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