Did you ever have an argument with your spouse where you both insist that you are right.


But really, all the while, as you ping pong back and forth to make your case, you know that YOU are the one who is right?  And then, at the end of the debate, you both walk away feeling like you’ve “won”.


Well, to be honest, you probably didn’t win.  There are really no winners when you both think you’ve won… there are just delusions… because sometimes (heck, most times) one of you is actually wrong (GASP! – who ME?  Wrong?  NO WAY!!!)


But on occasion, you sometimes feel that you’ve made such a firm stance on your correctness, that you’ve swayed the other person just enough. so that they’ve teetered towards your side of right from their side of wrong.


And there you have it.  A stalemate of rightness.


As with most debates, the crux of the argument is oftentimes your perception of something, or your recollection of something, or perhaps even something you heard or saw.  Therefore, there’s virtually no way whatsoever to prove your “rightness”.  And, that’s where the debate ends.  You can’t settle the argument because you can’t go back in time to replay what someone may have or may not have said.  You can’t always agree on how you heard something or what someone was feeling.  BUT, on the rarest of occasions… you do in fact have proof that you are right.  And those days, well those days, are magical days.  The “I told you so” days that every relationship thrives on (or perhaps dies on – but let’s not go there today!).


Too many debates end without an actual end.  No closure.  And, I’m here to tell you, there’s no closure more sweet than the closure of proven correctness (insert evil laugh here – muahahahahaha)


And that folks is the story I’d like to tell today.  So… here it goes:


security lightWe have motion sensor security lights outside of our garage.  For a really long time one of the lights wasn’t working, I asked hubby about it and he told me that the bulb wasn’t making a proper connection.   So, the fixture sat there.. only ½ working for quite some time.


A couple of weeks ago when I arrived home after dark, I realized that the other light bulb was out.


So I say to hubby…. “Hon, I think we need to buy a new light bulb for outside”

He replies: “No. I told you, that light doesn’t work anymore.”

So I say: “Well, I know you mentioned that the one side wasn’t making a connection, but the other one is now out – so we should buy some new bulbs”

Visibly aggravated he says:  “No, the entire light is broken and hasn’t worked for quite some time”

And I say: “No….. one bulb has been out for as long as I can remember but the other side has been lighting up until today”


And the debate has begun.


Me:  “Hon, I’m absolutely positive that one light bulb has been working”

Hubby:  “No it hasn’t”

Me:  “Yes, it has”

Hubby:  “No, you’re wrong… that light hasn’t worked for weeks”


I feel the need to pause in this story to remind you (or to direct you to some old posts – just click on the following links) about hubby’s Selective Vision and his inability to notice basic things around him (HERE or HERE).  So, now that I’ve put that out there back to our debate.


Me:  “The left side of the light has been working.. I’m pretty sure we just need a new bulb”

Hubby:  “You are completely wrong.  The light’s broken.  It’s been broken for a while.  It hasn’t been lighting up at all.  We just need to buy a whole new light fixture”

Me: “Uhm… I know the one side has been broken… you told me about the problem months ago, but I’m still pretty sure the left side has been working.”

Hubby:  “Nope, you are wrong.”


I can see this is going nowhere.  We have hit a stalemate of correctness.  We’re both right, neither of us is budging, and that’s it.


So I say:  “Hmmppff… ok, I guess we need to buy a new light”  and then I walk away.  Now, this is that moment I spoke about above.  The walk away moment where I still know that I am right.


A day or 2 go by.  I go to the store.  I buy a new light fixture AND a new light bulb.  When I get home, I wait until it’s dark and I replace the left light bulb.   HELLLOOOOOOOOO…. Let There Be Light!    So, just for the hell of it (I’m on a roll now).   I decide to take that brand new light blub out of the left socket and I put it into the right socket (remember – the one that’s totally broken and has been for months).  And, lo and behold…… Let There Be Light!   Now I’m aggravated that I have to go back to the store because not only do I need to return the new fixture BUT I also didn’t have the foresight to buy 2 light bulbs.  So, a day and 2 new light bulbs later, I have a fully functioning light fixture outside.  Imagine that!!


What a "broken" light looks like  - Oh, WAIT, that's not broken!

What a “broken” light looks like – Oh, WAIT, that’s not broken!

I say nothing.   There’s no need for “I told you so’s”.  The illuminated driveway will speak for itself…. Or, so I think.


Now, I’ll refer you back to hubby’s inability to actually notice things around him.

It’s been 5 full days since I “fixed” the light.  7 full days since our original debate.  And, there’s been no mention from a certain someone about the ray of light that has magically appeared outside our garage.  So, maybe, just maybe, he hasn’t actually noticed it yet. Perhaps folks, you are now joining me in my “I told you so” moment because if he really hasn’t seen it, this blog is what’s going to give it away!


There are really no words necessary.. I know I was right.    Somebody else will eventually (at least after reading this blog!) know I was right.  And, we’re back to having light on our driveway.  Did everybody win…… well yes, in this particular debate, I do think so!


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The Snack Battle

#TBT.. A glimpse back to Halloween of 2009. Too bad nothing has changed and I’m still wondering where all the Kit Kats went from the bag of Halloween candy I bought 2 weeks ago (and it’s only October 16th!)

The Hubby Diaries

Today is Halloween.  For normal people, Halloween is a time to celebrate the Fall season with tricks & treats and ghosts and goblins.

For me however, it’s a day to test my ingenuity.


Let me explain.


Hubby has a sweet tooth.  He has a weakness for certain candies & cookies.  Anytime I bring something into the house that I know he likes, I have to either:

  • Stash some away for me or….
  • Buy multiple boxes to ensure that I get a taste. 

I’m the kind of person that could make a box of cookies last weeks.  I may eat 2 today, then none for 3 days, then maybe 2 more, then none for a week.  The problem with this method of consumption is that by day number 5, when I go to the cabinet I cannot find the package of cookies…. because, while I’ve been savoring this snacking…

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Today, hubby and I celebrate our 11th wedding anniversary.  It’s certainly been a crazy ride.  I started this blog 3 days before our anniversary in 2009. (So, this is also my 5 year Blogiversary!)  I guess maybe,  it’s not a normal person who decides that an appropriate anniversary “gift” to their husband is a blog (open to the entire internet world) that shares all the things that are irritating, annoying, frustratingdang keyboard… I mean ENDEARING about living with him.


But, nobody ever said I was normal.   (Even my grandma – who is probably dancing somewhere in a far away place celebrating my anniversary – thought I was a little bit “not normal”)


So here we are 11 years into our marriage.  12+ years into our relationship.  And 5 years into a blog that many naysayers insisted would destroy the underlying fabric of our lives together.  To them, I say a big FAT phooey.


The only things that could destroy our marriage are crumbssoda cans, a distinct inability to clean properly and a lack of awareness of the laundry room.  And, thanks to this blog, rather than let these petty annoyances destroy our marriage I just share the stories with all of you and all of a sudden I feel better!  The blog is like therapy for me.  It lets me tell you all how insane our lives can be.  It lets you laugh along with us.  It lets you feel better about your marriage because you can either identify with us – OR – because you realize your spouse is awesome by comparison and you’re incredibly lucky to not be stuck eating flat cheese, worrying about which bowl to use for the ice cream, or having absurd conversations about pizza toppings with mine!


Like many marriages, ours works despite our differences.  Despite petty crap and despite the steam that can come out of my ears as I walk past a pile of hubby’s “stuff”, that’s been sitting in the family room for weeks, for like the bazillionth time.  Yes, those days are the days when I realize that I love him.  It make take me a while to get there – but eventually I do – and I realize that there’s nobody else’s underwear I want to step over. Nobody else’s toothpaste I want to wipe up.  And, nobody else’s quirks I want to write about.


Those are the days I realize what a great guy I have.  One who’s a great dad and truly a great partner.  Even if he just happens to annoy the ever-living-crap out of me sometimes.


There are many things that make each of us who we are.  These things could be described as; personality traits, idiosyncrasies, quirks.   For some, the words could be; weird, strange, eccentric, unique.    Regardless of the actual vocabulary you use to describe someone, think about this:  If every single one of us wasn’t just a little bit “weird”, in our own way, wouldn’t we all be exactly the same?  And isn’t some of that “uniqueness” exactly why you wound up with the person you are currently with?  So, every time your spouse reminds you of their uniqueness, it should also remind you of why you got together in first place.  And, on the days you want to kill each other… take a step back, think about the trait that’s bothering you and ask yourself……………. Is today the day I should I start a blog??


Happy Anniversary Hubby….. with many more to come!

choose again

The Super Frosty Zone

#TBT…. As always for throw back Thursday I share an older THD post. Since we’ve been a bit MIA lately (due to a vacation) I thought it was appropriate to share an old vacation story!

The Hubby Diaries

So, I’m certain that most of you are aware that hubby is a little quirky.   It’s equally what makes me love him and roll my eyes at him at the very same time!


Sometimes the things that come out of his mouth are so comical that you sit there, anxiously awaiting his admission that he’s kidding.. but usually this never comes.   I mean honestly, who needs to eat their cheese flat or requires specific bowls for specific foods?  But, even after all these years, he continues to find new ways to surprise me with his oddities!


Another obviously nutty quirk weaseled it’s way to the surface while we were on vacation last week.


Let me set the scene for you.


We’re lounging in the sun by the pool at our resort.  We’re lathered with sunscreen.  We’re listening to the ocean and watching the boats go…

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Peace Of Mind

This has been a crazy, exhausting and celebratory week.  Mini Hubby just turned 2 and I had the opportunity to reflect on the last 2 years of my life.  Two years that seemed to go by in the blink of an eye.


I can’t believe this little opinionated, independent, none-too-shy to express himself (often with an incredibly loud “NOOOOOOO MOMMMMY!”) little boy, was not even a part of our lives just two years ago.  I think about all the ways we’ve grown as a family.. more laundry, more messes, more pee all over the bathroom (and bed… and even the couch) but also more love, more giggles and a whole lot more insanity as my world became filled with 2 versions of my wonderful husband.


It’s like I have two toddlers, with opinions on just about everything.  From what we watch on tv to what I serve for dinner.  From the acceptable amount of time that crumbs can be left on the counter to what time we should all go to bed.  They both pretty much battle me over everything…. I however, have many years of training.  Hubby has prepared me well for this new little tornado that’s entered my house.  It’s like the last 10 years of our marriage he’s been prepping me for this new life.  All of his idiosyncrasies, his bizarre and ever-changing likes & dislikes, his lack of listening, lack of cleaning – you name it – it was apparently all to build my tolerance for the day we welcomed an actual little person living in our house!


Well… I accept the challenge. 


This little guy entered our world like a storm (over 3 weeks early) and he hasn’t stopped since.  And quite simply, after watching him grow over the past 2 years, I couldn’t imagine life without him.


So, when someone from LifebankUSA contacted me recently about a contest they are running: The LifebankUSA Peace of Mind $500 off Cord Blood Banking giveaway on Facebook I happily agreed to share it with all of you.  You see, Hubby & I are LifebankUSA customers.  Before mini-hubby came into our lives we did a lot research about cord blood banking.  And we agreed that with the unknown future of medical advancements, banking our cord blood was something that was very important to us.   If, under some horrific course of events, life threw some terrible medical problem at us 15 or 20 years from now that could have somehow be helped by cord blood, and we hadn’t saved it,  we would never forgive ourselves.


When we found out that LifebankUSA was the only company that offers cord blood, placenta blood, and tissue banking – and was the first to release placenta-derived stem cells for a successful transplant… we decided to do the whole trifecta.  For us, it was all about peace of mind.  I know that there are countless debates about stem cell research… but honestly when it comes to your baby (whether that baby is 2 days old or 30 years old) wouldn’t you do anything possible to keep them safe and healthy?  For us, that answer was undoubtedly yes… So, the next step was easy…find a company that could provide us with this service and then pray that you will never actually need to use it (it’s sort of like a life insurance policy…which, by the way, we both also got when mini hubby came along!).


500-logo3Anyhow, like I mentioned, they are having a contest on Facebook to win $500 off banking .  You can find the contest here:  LifebankUSA Peace of Mind ContestPLUS, they also offered me a special coupon code that is only available for Hubby Diaries readers.  If you sign up at  www.lifebankusa.com and use the code:  BLOG you will get a $250 Visa gift card with any of their banking programs (discounts cannot be combined).  This is a great deal, if you’re considering cord or placenta blood banking.


Through cord blood banking, you can collect and preserve potentially lifesaving stem cells, and doing so could one day save the life of your child or a blood relative. You can bank even more stem cells by collecting them from 2 usable sources of stem cell-rich blood: the umbilical cord and the placenta.   Who knows what the future holds… and in my opinion, it’s better to be prepared for anything.. which is why we did both!


And,  in case that’s not enough, don’t forget… one day maybe they’ll be able to use stem cells to actually clone people and, if I’m ever feeling like my life isn’t challenging enough,  I could arrange to get a few additional EXACT REPLICAS of my boys.    Okkkkkkkkkkk….. maybe not….. or better yet, HELL  NO!   I’m not that crazy!  HA!  


So, I encourage you to do your own research and check it out… if it’s right for you and your family enter the contest and use the discount code: BLOG!!


(for the record – for those of you who are missing the humor in my above comment and are now all fired up because you’re anti cloning-  here’s my disclaimer:  I don’t believe LifebankUSA offers or participates in cloning people and I don’t personally think people should be cloned.  There ya go, disclaimer over, lighten up people!)

I guess I'm part of that 99%!!

I guess I’m part of that 99%!!

HELP! I Can’t Find It!

In honor of #TBT, I share an older post from THD history every Thursday. If you have a husband who can’t EVER find ANYTHING. this one’s for you!

The Hubby Diaries

A typical conversation in my house (you can insert any item you’d like into this conversation)


Hubby:  “I looked everywhere, it’s gone”

Me: “You looked everywhere….. hmmm??”

Hubby: “Yes, I just spent the last 10 minutes looking for it, and it’s not there”

Me: “Did you look in the closet?”

Hubby: “Yep”

Me: “Did you look in the cubby in the garage?”

Hubby: “Yes, I even picked up the stuff and checked behind it”

Me: “Are you sure you really looked?”

Hubby: “Yes, it’s gone”

Me: “So, if I were to get up right now and look in the closet, it wouldn’t be there”

Hubby: “No way… “

Me: “So, if I did happen to find it, how much will you give me?”

Hubby: “I’m not giving you anything… it’s not there”

Me: “Ok, $5.00 if I find it”


I stop whatever I’m doing, walk upstairs…

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