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Posts Tagged ‘Droid’

Well, I’m coming up for one brief gasp of air.   I simply cannot remember the last time I was this busy for work.  Needless to say, I haven’t been home enough to keep up with the blog.

 

I also haven’t been home enough to move the TP roll from the counter to the holder (I know how difficult it is to extend your arm that extra 2 feet hubby…..)

 

(at the time of picture taking, we were on 4 days and counting)

 

And… I haven’t been home enough to pick hubby’s dirty clothes up off the floor

 

(at the time of picture taking…. we were going on a full week..)

 

But, I did have a moment a week or so ago to stumble upon, what very well may be, the Best. Present. Ever.  for dear hubby.  I was Googling something random and this image popped up on my screen. 

 

 

It was simply fate for me to come across this.

 

Who knew that there are either other insane men out there in the universe who think they are 1/2 Mayor & 1/2 Ninja…. OR, somebody, somewhere, reads my blog and decided to custom design an item specifically for my hubby.

 

So, needless to say, I had to order one and I happily presented this surprise to hubby last Friday.   Perhaps I’m truly my own worst enemy…. I’m now supporting hubby’s absurdity by buying him a Half Mayor, Half Ninja badge that he can proudly wear.  And, let me just say…… he is indeed treating this like an affirmation & absolute proof  that he worthy of the titles he’s bestowed upon himself.

 

And… if this isn’t making any sense to you… please read:

This – I Am The Mayor

And This –  The Fruit Ninja Architect 

 

I guess I have to take some responsibility for creating my own monster…………

 

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I mentioned earlier this week that hubby has developed quite an intimate relationship with his Droid phone.


I also mentioned that he’s become a little “app” crazy.  He searches for new apps continuously and he’s even developed an interest in a variety of new things driven by apps he’s stumbled upon.


A Couple of Examples:


Frequent Shopper Cards – It’s been a life-long battle with hubby to get him to put frequent shopper cards on his key chain.  Grocery stores, Borders, Panera, CVS, Petsmart.. you name it, we probably have a card for it.  My key chain is littered with upwards of 10 cards.  Hubby however has staunchly refused to add any, other than the ones that are absolutely necessary (ie: the card for our main grocery store and the one for his gym).  BUT, he has discovered an app that manages all these cards and allows him to easily see specials that are available to him for being a card member.  I’ve never seen him so excited to look for a discount (you may remember that he only likes to save money, if it’s zero work for him).   And apparently, this app is as close to zero work as possible.  Score one for me… hubby is looking for coupons!!

Savvy Shopping – You may recall that hubby HATES comparison shopping.  Well truth be told, he just hates shopping period.  He will do plenty of research on line but, the minute we hit a store, he wants to buy the first thing we come across.  He has no interest in going to multiple stores to compare prices or to consider options.  He wants to be in-and-out in the blink of an eye and has sent me shopping alone on quite a few occasions, to “choose my finalists”, so he only has to go to one store.  Well, this app changes all that.  Hubby is EXCITED to comparison shop. He whips out his phone, clicks on the app and scans the bar code.  He’s standing in Best Buy declaring, “we can find this cheaper at Lowes”.  He’s also able to read reviews on products and is now encouraging me to consider multiple options.  I don’t even know who this new guy is… he has actually become a “savvy shopper” just like the app promised!  Although, much like a man with a new toy scanner… he’s scanning bar codes on just about everything!  Uhmm hubby, we don’t need to comparison shop the price of Oreo cookies…


But perhaps the most annoying new app, comes with regular broadcasting of how cool hubby is (and bear in mind I use that word cool VERY loosely!).


This new app gives hubby the ability to bestow titles upon himself, to oust other people from their current position of power, and to grow his head even larger than it already is.


This app is otherwise known as Foursquare.  Now, for those of you who don’t know what this is… it’s an app that allows you to virtually “check in” wherever you happen to be.  Many stores offer special discounts to customers who “check in” and you can also have your “check ins” automatically post to Facebook, at which time you are ‘rated’ against anyone else who has also checked in at the same location.  This is where the problems begin.


If hubby happens to be the person who has checked in more times than any other person at a given location, he is declared The Mayor of that location.  If you have formed any sort of picture of hubby in your mind from reading this blog, then you know why this could present a problem.


Hubby arrives home from work and with a smirk and a glint in his eye, he declares…. “I am now the mayor of 123 Main St (substitute in our address….)”   “Oh, you are, are you?”.  I respond.  “Yep, I sure am.  Didn’t you see it on Facebook, I am now the Mayor, you must bow down to me!” (yeah right…..)

Hubby has his umpteenth burrito of the week…. “I only have to check in 4 more times this week, and I will be the Mayor of Chipotle”.  A few days later…. “I’m now the proud Mayor of Chipotle, bet you wish you were me!” (uhhmm no, not really)

Hubby frequently lunches with a friend at work… they often go to the same places and they both “check in” on Foursquare.  Hubby says “Hmmmm,  we’re going to have to go to Jersey Mikes Subs over the weekend or I’m never going to oust Leon and become the Mayor.”


So, you can probably see how this could present a challenge to my every day existence.   As I ask hubby to wipe the kitchen counter and he responds… “I don’t need to do that…. I am The Mayor”.  Or, I ask him to take out the garbage and he replies “The mayor doesn’t do such menial tasks”


I suppose now that hubby is comparison shopping and looking at coupons, I have to be willing to take the good with the bad.  And…..I’ve always said that ‘bright lights, bells & whistles’ will make just about anything better.  Considering this phone can now act as a flashlight, pretend it’s a police siren and whistles the Old Spice commercial every time he gets a text message…. it fulfills all the necessary requirements to help make shopping more “fun”.



Now all I need is for someone to fill me in on the necessary tactics one must take to overthrow a mayor??  (Aside of course from getting my own phone and checking in on Foursquare?!!)


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It’s certainly no secret that hubby likes his electronics.


The researching, the gadgetry, the speed, the newness, the “cool factor”.. they are all important to him.


So, about 4 months ago when hubby declared “Only 4 months until I’m up for a new cell phone”, I knew I was in trouble.


He started researching his options. He read chat boards, user reviews and internet articles. All trying to answer the heavily weighted question of Droid vs iPhone. We’d sit in front of the tv and he’d recap his learnings from the day. He’d talk about technology, features and apps until he lulled me into a deep sleep. He’d swing back and forth between the options like a pendulum swinging between ‘huge mistake’ and ‘absolute awesomeness’. Ultimately determining that the Droid was the option that would provide the most Awesomeness.


But I suppose the most important thing in this pre-planning stage was the vigor with which he researched and the timeline that he set for himself. I mean, with 4 months lead time, most people could build an extension on their homes or possibly conduct extensive disease research. But for hubby it was the appropriate timeline to take on the project of picking a new phone.. something a lesser man could potentially do in say, 15 minutes at the Verizon store. Anyhow, the day finally arrived when hubby’s contract allowed for a new phone upgrade and he ran like wild horses to the store.


This was about 4 weeks ago…. and I haven’t seen hubby since.


This is NOT hubby... but I'm pretty sure this is how he envisions himself as a Fruit Ninja

Ok, slight exaggeration. I see hubby all the time. I see him on the couch with his new toy. I see him on the computer googling recommended app options. I see him sling-shotting birds to kill pigs. I see him erecting bridges to support trains full of people. I see him Facebooking, and Foursquaring and looking at constellations. I also hear hubby. I hear him changing ring tones. I hear him getting email alerts. I hear him slashing fruit as he pretends he’s a fruit ninja. I hear him playing games and surfing the internet.


Yes, hubby has started an affair with his new Thunderbolt. And now, in order to communicate with hubby as I sit next to him, I need to send him an email or text message……. we have become those people!


Just what we needed, yet another distraction for him. Now he sits in the middle of the room, surrounded by crumbs, empty soda cans, crumbled paper towels and tumbleweeds of dog hair as he plays with his angry birds…


If only they made some sort of cleaning app….. then maybe we’d both be equally excited about his new phone!


Where’s the app for THAT??

 

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