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Posts Tagged ‘snacks’

If you’ve ever had a sensation, any sensation, then this story might just irritate you as much as it did me.  Because, contrary to many beliefs (most of which come from hubby), not all sensations are good sensations and what may be a good sensation to one person may not necessarily be a good sensation to another.  And no, regardless of where your mind just went… this is not at all about S E X.

 

So, please let me explain.

 

Sometimes I like to make impulse purchases.  You know, the kind when you’re shopping and randomly come upon something  that you didn’t think you needed, but now that it’s staring you straight in the face, beckoning you, you decide now is the time to buy.

 

I’ve wound up with random household décor items this way.   I’ve found a new home for a pair of sunglasses that seemed to jump out at me as I was on my way to buy cleaning supplies.  Just last week, I came home with new bath towels.  Not because I needed bath towels but because they were there.  I was there.  They were on sale.  I was there.  I imagined them in my bathroom and then *poof* they were magically in my hands.

 

Sometimes hubby benefits from this wonderful trait.  He’s come upon a new bathing suit, some shorts and even box of cookies all because of my fine-tuned, impulse buying abilities.

 

And sometimes, he benefits in a very unintended way.

 

I was grocery shopping recently.  You know, a task that I cannot send hubby to do because sending him to the grocery store actually creates more work for me (In case you didn’t read about the last time he tried to grocery shop please go HERE.  Go ahead, I’ll wait.)  As I was checking out, staring at that at the rack filled with impulse items, I had a weak moment and I bought myself a treat.  One of the best kinds of treats.  Better than towels.  Better than a candle holder.  It was one of those items where you tell yourself, I’ve had a hard day, I’ve earned this.  A treat of the edible, chocolate variety.  I bought myself a Kit Kat and a York Peppermint Pattie.

 

I tossed these treats into my purse as I loaded my cart with bags of groceries.  Then I got in the car, likely side tracked by God only knows what (since my brain doesn’t work anymore since I had the baby) and I forgot I had rewarded myself with these delectable bits of heaven.

 

The next day I’m getting ready for work and I spot the treats peaking at me from my purse.  So, I take them out and gingerly place them on the counter… right in the spot where my purse always sits.. to await my return.  Now, if I’d been hubby I would likely have stuffed these babies into my mouth right then & there.  Never mind that it was 7:00am or that I had just brushed my teeth.  He would have stood there wiping his mouth as bits of chocolate dropped onto the floor & counter only to be discovered (and cleaned) by a not so happy wife later.  But I digress.  I am not hubby and I wanted to leave them so I could savor them at the appropriate moment in the future.

 

So…. Imagine my surprise later, when I return to the spot where I stowed away my treats, only to….  W  A  I  T…… where are my treats??  I see the Kit Kat BUT, the Peppermint Pattie is gone.  Is it under these papers.. NO?!  Has it fallen to the floor…… NOPE!?  Uhm, did the fairies take it????  WTH.  I want my Peppermint Patty NOW and it’s gone.

 

I yell across the house… “Hey hon,  I had a Peppermint Patty here on the counter… did you see it?”

And from a distance I hear…. “Uhm, yeah, I saw it”

 

And that’s when the sensation starts….. a sensation that something is not right.  A sensation that something is amiss.  A sensation that I somehow, some way, got screwed out of enjoying MY Peppermint Patty.

 

 

And then, I’d like to say sheepishly, but it was probably more like – sheepishly proud of himself, hubby comes over.  And you know what he says?????????

Swiss Alps15

 

“I saw the Peppermint Patty.  I saw it on the counter.  I saw it unwrap.  I saw it enter my mouth.  And, then I had the sensation of the skiing in the Swiss Alps with a cool fresh breeze blowing in my face.  And, you know what….” He says…….  “ It was AWESOME”.

 

 

And then, he got to enjoy the sensation of me punching him square in the jaw.

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It may not surprise you that hubby is a big fan of Halloween.   Not necessarily the type of Halloween fan that I’d prefer –  the kind that starts thinking about cool, goofy and elaborate costumes weeks before the holiday (my dear hubby would need to have his life threatened to ever think about putting on a Halloween costume).  So you may be wondering, if he hates the dressing up part of Halloween, what part does he actually like?

 

If you’ve been a long time reader, you probably have your hand up in the air… screaming ooooh… ooooh – pick me, pick me!  So, we’ll just pretend I can hear you.   YES!  the part of Halloween he likes are the TREATS.  You see, hubby has an incredible sweet tooth and he sure does love his candies.

 

If you remember my Halloween post from 2 years ago, you may recall that I waited until Halloween week to buy any candy for trick-or-treaters.  This was a well thought out plan on my part to ensure that there was actually candy in the cupboard when I opened it on Oct 31st.  It was the only way to make sure hubby didn’t get his grubby, sticky little paws all over the treats before the holiday.   You may also recall that he can consume just about any snack at the speed of light and, unless I can sneak away a piece or two, I may not actually get any at all.

 

While some of you may remember all of this, apparently I have selective memory, or I had a momentary lapse of sanity or just possibly, I have just lost my mind over the past month because…….. while I was shopping at Costco last month I came across a bulk bag of Halloween candy.  The perfect mix of items that we both like so I thought to myself. “Self, you should buy this bag…. it will make your life easier, you won’t have to shop later, and you can cross Halloween candy shopping off your ‘To Do’ list”.  But, what I neglected to consider was The Hubby Factor.

 

This is the bag I purchased…… 125 PIECES!!!!

 

 

So after the bag sat in the cabinet for about a week or so, I went to grab a piece… and, lo and behold… there were 3 whoppers left.  Can you guess which was hubby’s preferred item in bag?

 

There are still about 3 weeks left until Halloween……….

 

A few days later and I go for a snack and the bag is shockingly light…. more than half the Reese’s are gone.

 

There are still over 2 weeks left until Halloween……….

 

That weekend I feel like a piece of candy and wind up getting the last Reese’s (hubby was probably worried about taking the last one so he had moved onto the Hershey bars… about half of them are gone)

 

There are still about 2 weeks left until Halloween………

 

I’m sure it wouldn’t surprise you to hear that the week before Halloween the only candy that’s left is the Hershey’s with almonds… and this is only because hubby doesn’t like his chocolate “ruined” with nuts (much like his contaminated pizza!)

 

Needless to say, Halloween was almost upon us and, rather than having one less thing to shop for, I’m now without any candy at all.    You’d think after 9 years of living with hubby I would have known better than to buy candy so early (or I would have been smart enough to hide half of the bag) but sometimes, my brain just doesn’t work properly…. either that or hubby has started putting something in my coffee in the morning that gives him the ability to control my thoughts…………

 

Hmmmmmmmmmm…… maybe I’m on to something here……………….

 

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Today is Halloween.  For normal people, Halloween is a time to celebrate the Fall season with tricks & treats and ghosts and goblins.

 

For me however, it’s a day to test my ingenuity.

 

Let me explain.

 

Hubby has a sweet tooth.  He has a weakness for certain candies & cookies.  Anytime I bring something into the house that I know he likes, I have to either:

  • Stash some away for me or….
  • Buy multiple boxes to ensure that I get a taste. 

 

I’m the kind of person that could make a box of cookies last weeks.  I may eat 2 today, then none for 3 days, then maybe 2 more, then none for a week.  The problem with this method of consumption is that by day number 5, when I go to the cabinet I cannot find the package of cookies…. because, while I’ve been savoring this snacking experience, Hubby has been devouring all the cookies.

 

Then the conversation goes something like this:

 

Me:  “What happened to the cookies?”

Hubby: “I ate them”

Me: “But I didn’t get any at all…”

Hubby:  “Well then, you should have eaten them quicker”

Me: “Quicker??  I bought them 3 days ago”

Hubby: “So?”

Me: “So, how could you eat them all in only 3 days.”

Hubby: “Well, I eat 3 at a time.”

Me: “But it was only 3 days ago”

Hubby: “Well, you took too long. You gotta be quicker”

Me:  “Humpf …. Next time I’m hiding them”

There’s rarely a concept of sharing.  Hubby is conducting his own Survival of The Fittest with the cookie reward going to the top of the food chain.  If I can’t get my hand into a bag quick enough I may blink and all if it will be gone.  I joked about Hubby “sharing” items by ensuring that there is always ONE left in the bag/jar/box.  I think, on occasion, he feels sorry for the weaker person in the house (aka ME) and he leaves one sad, solitary item for me.  

 

What he doesn’t realize is, I’ve developed my own way to counteract this behavior.  I have started buying things that I know Hubby doesn’t really like.  Things like cookies or candies with nuts or coconut.  Miraculously, every time I go to get one, they are sitting right were I left them, waiting for me.  A tiny battle that I’ve won!

 

So, back to Halloween….

 candy

Knowing Hubby’s proclivities, I waited until YESTERDAY to buy the candy (this way I know hubby couldn’t get into it and eat it all before the holiday)  And, in addition to buying items hubby likes, the bowl is filled with Snickers, Peanut M&Ms and Almond Joys (this one is a good ol’ double whammy!)

 

My only other choice would be to hide some snacks in a place where I know hubby will never go… like say…… the laundry room!    (Oh damn!  I just gave away the hiding spot!)

 

Hey, I can be pretty creative if I need to be… (the linen closet is probably a good place too!  sshhhhhhhhh.. don’t tell him!)

 

Where do you hide your snacks?!

 

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