Having A Baby Is Like Buying A New TV

It’s no secret that men, in general, don’t jump to do household projects.  This is especially true when these projects are assembled into a nice “To Do” list by the woman in their lives.  The only projects that they might approach with a tad more enthusiasm are things that directly impact them and are deemed FUN.   As I’ve mentioned before, these projects would likely involve a beloved hobby, or some sort of electronics.   I mean heck, there’s no way a new TV would make it’s way into the house and sit in the box, unopened and uninstalled, for weeks.   BUT, a new piece of furniture that requires assembly could be tucked in a corner awaiting that special furniture assembly day  2-3 weeks (and approximately 6 nagging statements from the wife) in the future!

 

It’s also a proven fact that men intentionally do projects wrong so that we will never ask them to do the project again.  But, I’m onto this strategy and it simply does not fly in our house….. sorry hubby!

 

Now, knowing all of this…. Imagine my surprise when hubby exhibited “out of character” behavior.

 

We’ve been receiving assorted new baby gifts in the mail over the last couple of weeks.

 

One day, our travel system stroller arrived.  It requires assembly.   And, moments after hubby sees it’s arrived, he’s tearing into the box to it see it.   And, I thought it would end there, but NO…. he’s pulling out pieces and looking for instructions – WHO IS THIS GUY?  The next thing I know, the stroller is assembled.

 

Then another day, our mobile arrives….. and hubby’s giddy with excitement as he pulls out the pieces and immediately starts putting it together.  Within 10 minutes, he’s in our nursery attaching it to the crib!  WHAT’S GOTTEN INTO HIM????

 

And then, earlier this week our nursery decals arrive (we’ve been waiting for these for weeks and they are the last piece of having a complete nursery for the arrival of our new little one).  I arrived home from work shortly after hubby and as I pulled in the driveway, I could see the light on in the nursery.   I walked inside and it looked as if hubby walked in, dumped everything on the kitchen counter, and immediately disappeared.  I can see mail strewn about, his work bag dropped on the floor, and it’s obvious everything was hastily abandoned in the midst of his excitement over the mail.  So, I walk upstairs and hubby is unrolling decals and laying them out on the floor.  He dropped EVERYTHING, to do this right away.   HOLY CRAP – HE REALLY CAN DO PROJECTS RIGHT AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

So, my dear blog readers I can only come to one conclusion:   Having a new baby is like buying a new TV.  Which I suppose is a really good thing, since hubby’s obviously incredibly excited about it and (without any nagging) quickly doing projects…… it’s truly a MIRACLE!   BUT, here’s my concern.   By hubby’s assessment we seem to need a new TV every few years…. And, I’m just not sure this is gonna work out if we need to get a new baby with the same frequency!!!!!

 

Become a fan of The Hubby Diaries on Facebook http://www.facebook.com/thehubbydiaries

or

Follow on Twitter: http://twitter.com/thehubbydiaries

 

 

Read Full Post »

What’s Mine Is Yours…. Right?

In my home, I have realized that if there’s an item that doesn’t provide hubby with some sort of enjoyment or conversely some sort of stress, it really never hits his radar and therefore is unimportant to him in his every day life.  And, if it’s unimportant to him… apparently I am the only one who pays attention to it.  And, I have to admit that hubby & I are generally not focused on the same things…

 

So, anything that applies to the home, is purchased for our home, or is used for decorating our home is for Me

Unless, and this is a huge unless, it provides some sort of happiness & fun for hubby.    

If it provides hubby with some entertainment or enjoyment then it may be for Us. 

But….. if it’s a source of hubby’s happiness (ie. the Man Cave or a TV).. then it’s surely for Him.

 

What do I mean by this??  Well, I’ve noticed this trend over the years and it has come to light again recently since we just renovated our family room for HGTV.  The things that cause me stress.. or at least draw my immediate attention, are NOT the same things that attract hubby’s immediate focus.

 

We have a beautiful new family room.  It’s so nice that it draws attention to how bad our kitchen counters are.  This makes me want to bump the kitchen counters closer to the top of our “To Do” list.  We also have a bathroom that’s 1/3 renovated from almost 2 years ago.   I walk into it each & every day and wistfully think about the day that I will have a new vanity.  We also have quite a few touch ups necessary from the recent TV renovation we did. The room is sort of finished… by sort of I mean, we did a 72 hour renovation for TV.  Let’s be honest, the magic of TV (hopefully) allowed us to finish the room for the camera, when in fact, there are quite a few things that need to be tweaked in real life. 

 

What projects does hubby think about? 

• Moving our patio door to a completely different location on the back of our house
• Building a new deck in our backyard
• Buying a new dishwasher (ours works perfectly fine… even if it does sound like an airplane taking off)

 

Are hubby’s projects important.. YES

Are they on our long term project list… YES

Will we eventually make our way to these tackling these items.. YES

Must we forgo all the other projects that are higher on the “To Do” list just to satisfy his need for immediate gratification…. Uhm… I’d like to say NO!

 

When hubby gets something in his head.. he wants immediate gratification… yes, he’s that guy.  So, once he becomes fixated on something (even if it’s something we won’t really need or use for 5-6 months) he wants it done now.  And, all I can say is… what about new curtains or my kitchen counters?

But you see.. that’s the problem…. It’s MY kitchen… and MY curtains…

Whereas the patio door & new deck are arguably His (at least in his mind)… or quite possibly Ours.  As for the dishwasher, while I suppose technically.. it’s mine (based on my aforementioned logic)…. It is loud enough to interrupt hubby’s TV viewing which puts it into the category of a stressor… which gets hubby’s attention and therefore obviously requires immediate action.   You can see how this cycle works!

 

If only we truly saw things through the same eyes… Or, if all the stuff in the house was actually OURS.  Maybe we’d be closer to being on the same page.  But, I live in reality and I know how hubby’s mind works.  If it’s not impacting hubby TODAY and either making him happy or unhappy it’s just not on his radar and probably never will be!

 

Now, if I could only find a way to make curtains & counters fun… maybe I could begin to solve marriage problems all over the world!

Read Full Post »